Hey you guys, I just thought I would make up some of those redneck jokes for atvers. They have them for computer nuts, hunters, fishermen, Nascar fans, etc., so why not us? Let me know what you think, and if you think of any more post them here.

WARNING: If you are offended by humorous material please hit the back button on your browser now.

YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK ATV OWNER:
1. If you have a spit cup wired to your handlebars
2. If you have more than one container of Skoal in your storage box
3. When you go hunting your atv blends into the background better than you do
4. Your atv sits higher than your pickup truck
5. You refer to your front rack as your beer pad and your back rack as your deer pad
6. If you have a tatoo that says, "My mama was an atv"
7. If overhanging limbs keep getting caught in your CB antenna
8. If you've ever been arrested by the highway patrol for driving your atv to work
9. If you're waiting for the dirt to wear off your atv
10. If you have a sticker that says, "I love Wal-Mart" on your atv
11. If your atv cost more than your house.
12. If all of the presents under your Christmas tree come from an atv accessories catalog
13. If you have an atv up on blocks in your front yard
14. If your atv is a rolling billboard for your favorite Nascar driver.

 

I always figured it was easier to just spit off to one side. If you had a passenger, you might watch your aim.

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Andy Bassham *(1999 Arctic Cat 500 4x4, 1989 Honda 300)*

 

good one keepum coming!!!!!You might be aredneck if you ever had to crawl water tower with bucket of paint to cover your atv brand name.

[This message has been edited by corncob2 (edited 09-10-1999).]

 

In John Deere green!

 

You might be a redneck if your idea of tire sealant is a plug of your Beechnut.

 

You might be an ATV Redneck if:

You wash your ATV more than your underwear

Your ATV cost more than your truck

If you have a "You can have my gun when you pry it from my cold dead fingers" bumper sticker on your ATV fender

Your first ATV ride was on your Momma's ATV!

You bought a pressure washer just for your ATV.

You've been banned at the local 50 cent
car wash.

The grass grows better now where you wash your ATV.

Your kids think riding through the mud is better than going to Dollywood!

You hear your kids say, "My Daddy's Arctic Cat can stomp your Daddy's Polaris!"
(insert politically correct brand name as
needed....no offense fellas!)

Keep em coming!!!


------------------
Rob Ervin 99' AC500

 

You have added an extra battery to run the 4 100watt KC spotlights attached to the handlebars just left of the personally designed beer holder.

Your biggest fear is of tree limbs scratching the NASCAR stickers off of the fenders.

Your brand new Sportsman 500 has a set of "Boss Hog" style horns mounted to the front rack.

If you consider the decision to replace the Boss Hogg horns with a MACK Truck Bulldog ornament a major dilema.

If your new mudflaps display the Yosemite Sam "Back Off!!" logo.

If you consider snakeskin boots, a turquoise concho belt, cutoff levi's, a spuds mckenzie t-shirt, and a CAT dozer hat as preffered riding gear.

If your riding helmet has a wire facemask and a Alabama Crimson Tide logo.

If you have constant flats from running over Jack Daniels bottles in your back yard.

If your whip flag displays the confederate emblem.

If your confederate flag is in need of replacement.

If you think that Stick Stoppers is something you might need to avoid injury from your wife.

If you have a child safety seat bolted to your front rack.



------------------
Andy Bassham *(1999 Arctic Cat 500 4x4, 1989 Honda 300)*

 

Come down to a Texas mud run, and you can see all of the above in action! I wish I was kidding. :-)

 

We're on a roll now boys!

 

I think you boys forgot the infamous milk crate tied on to the rack or the bundles of baling wire in the storage box. I wasn't aware there was any skoal users in here. Come on down to Oklahoma, and we'll show ya some rednecks!

350XX, 250R, 200XX, 450S