Sad but true.

 

Moose, too funny!
Scooter too real!!
PBL

 

Quad Killer - That pebble you straddled dead center of your quad that suddenly jumps out of the sand and becomes the size of a boulder lifting your quad off the ground when your skid plate hits it.

OH SH*T - First set of words you say as your quads rear skid plate end hits that pebble you staddled lifting you at least two feet into the air.

Holy F****K - your second set of words as your looking at the broken skid plate dangling by the last bent bolt from the rear differental, always followed by the mental though how am I going to explain this to the wife.

Playing in the sandbox - Riding your high strung 450cc racing quad in the any area in the desert that you take the cherry riders to learn how to drive their quad without killing themselves, BTW there are no mogals, no jumps and your driving so slow your quad stalls out all the time.

Sand Bath - What you give the LA yuppy quad rider idiot campers who park their RV's to close to the High Bank Oval tracks in the Desert.

Sand Bath Gratification - That feeling of satisfaction you get as you watch the Epic Sized sun light choking cloud of dust you just made as it settle's over the RV as the yuppy riders are trying to eat their three course meal lunch - Welcome to the Mojave Desert you morons-.

Car Killers - These are the Endurance race track mogals and hill climbs, these are big enough and deep enough to swallow full size trucks and jeeps whole, on any weekend some beer fueled moron attempts to take the family truckster onto the track.

Mojave Desert Parts Store - What is left laying in the race tracks after the family trucksters try to run the tracks. Usually find bumpers, exhaust lines, complete tail and head light assemblies, coolers, basically anything that is not nailed down inside the vehicle and every now and then complete fenders from every vehicle brand know.

Last but not least

You Did What to your Quad - Words heard from your wife as you try to explain why your not breathing very well and the right side of the handle bar of your brand new quad is bent down over an inch, She really does not care that it was your ribcage that bent the bar down she is P*ssed that the 8k quad she bought you for your birthday now needs a new handlebar after only the second time you have ridden it.

Grounded - Wife's payback until your ribs are healed and for going out and spending $150.00+ on that new MOTO racing handlebar after wreaking the quad.

 

Love those two.

Got a new one of my own after 2 surprises while riding in Maine.

Moose-noun 1) Often spoken of when referring to a certain rider in New England who could stand to lose 100 pounds. 2) A large four legged version with the same name as above of a wild variety. It has a habit of loping out of the woods while you are ripping around blind corners at 35 mph.

IBM- Involuntary Bowel Movement. What usually happens when the above riding moose almost runs into the wild variety while ripping through a corner. Thankfully, not in the above cases last week...

 

Not my wife..a trip to the bike shop usually results in new riding shirts for the wife.

Best trip to the bike shop was last year. Went in for a quart of oil and walked out with a quart of oil and my birthday present..My LTR 450.

Life is good when you have a wife who loves to ride with you.

 

Yep, the wife went on a moose watch ride with me and loves going out. Still can't talk her into a new 850 X2 so I can use the 500 X2 as a loaner.

Credit-noun-What your wife says we have great amounts of but can't use to get the new quad we've been wanting.

Sense-noun-What my wife says I'm not making any of...

 

Wife now has her sights set on a Can Am Spyder, Hoping next spring for a set of Can Ams

 

Facialhairsubstractious-N. What happens when you try to remove an ATV tire from it's rim by first cutting with a Sawzall and then using a torch to "burn off" the last bits of tire near the rim, not knowing that the previous owner had used Fix-a-Flat. Example-See Beergut.

 

Hey Moose, it would be cool if this definition was in BG's signature area for a while

 

Haahahahahaha.... Maybe I'll ask the moderators to throw it in. BGs a good sport about all the ribbing.