Heart broken.
#21
09-07-2005, 04:14 PM
Heart broken.
Originally posted by: learnem
Before I start my rant. I will pre apologize to anyone I offend, as the following is just my observations.
If it wasn't for men, with all of the quality of life inventions throughout the last few thousand years by men, women probably wouldn't have survived. It was men who built weapons protected them, built fires to warm them, killed animals, and gathered food to feed them, men who allowed them to be equal in our society, when physically, they are not. Granted our society has developed way past the need for physicality to survive, but it was men who engineered that.
It really pisses me off when women expect to be put on a pedestal by their men, when they don't really deserve it! They bitch and complain, because they are "more verbal" than men, but don't want us to fix anything that they are bitching about, they just want to"vent"....
Before I start my rant. I will pre apologize to anyone I offend, as the following is just my observations.
If it wasn't for men, with all of the quality of life inventions throughout the last few thousand years by men, women probably wouldn't have survived. It was men who built weapons protected them, built fires to warm them, killed animals, and gathered food to feed them, men who allowed them to be equal in our society, when physically, they are not. Granted our society has developed way past the need for physicality to survive, but it was men who engineered that.
It really pisses me off when women expect to be put on a pedestal by their men, when they don't really deserve it! They bitch and complain, because they are "more verbal" than men, but don't want us to fix anything that they are bitching about, they just want to"vent"....
I wasnt going to do this because I know this guy must be hurting and confused, but you made too many interesting points to ignore.
Re read what you have posted, and I think its obvious that "man" has made his own problems 100% of the way.
Why does it seem that as we have seen woman become stronger and more powerful in her place in society that at the same time man has become so much weaker? Have we allowed them to drain us of our power or ability?
Before modern lazyness (or is that civilazation lol) not only was divorce unheard of, but depending on your culture you either had plenty more wives, or several other reasons not to be nearly as concerned as today. Then again what man of several hundred years ago would take anothers "permanently" ? I know there are many cultures of the past (some even present) that would boggle our minds when compared to todays standards, but even though some were extreme I think the question is where or when did things pass the middle of the road in the opposite direction.
So here we sit in our own mess we created, and those of us who refuse to give in to becoming the common whimp so many men have become and are still battling the temtation of becoming so reliant on our women that they become our man. Fortunately there are some of us remaining for those women who dont favor a limp noodle (no pun intended).
I dont discount the value of a relationship or family by the above statements, and only point out that even the best of us would have been called a "wuss" or "whipped" by our great grandfathers, and I wont get into the discussion of the conditions they and we live in.
Still there is plenty of happiness out there for us all no matter how weak or strong, and I hope everyone finds what their looking for from their relationship.
#22
09-07-2005, 05:54 PM
#23
09-07-2005, 06:02 PM
#24
09-07-2005, 06:55 PM
Heart broken.
Originally posted by: 440EX026
I wasnt going to do this because I know this guy must be hurting and confused, but you made too many interesting points to ignore.
Re read what you have posted, and I think its obvious that "man" has made his own problems 100% of the way..
Originally posted by: learnem
Before I start my rant. I will pre apologize to anyone I offend, as the following is just my observations.
If it wasn't for men, with all of the quality of life inventions throughout the last few thousand years by men, women probably wouldn't have survived. It was men who built weapons protected them, built fires to warm them, killed animals, and gathered food to feed them, men who allowed them to be equal in our society, when physically, they are not. Granted our society has developed way past the need for physicality to survive, but it was men who engineered that.
It really pisses me off when women expect to be put on a pedestal by their men, when they don't really deserve it! They bitch and complain, because they are "more verbal" than men, but don't want us to fix anything that they are bitching about, they just want to"vent"....
Before I start my rant. I will pre apologize to anyone I offend, as the following is just my observations.
If it wasn't for men, with all of the quality of life inventions throughout the last few thousand years by men, women probably wouldn't have survived. It was men who built weapons protected them, built fires to warm them, killed animals, and gathered food to feed them, men who allowed them to be equal in our society, when physically, they are not. Granted our society has developed way past the need for physicality to survive, but it was men who engineered that.
It really pisses me off when women expect to be put on a pedestal by their men, when they don't really deserve it! They bitch and complain, because they are "more verbal" than men, but don't want us to fix anything that they are bitching about, they just want to"vent"....
I wasnt going to do this because I know this guy must be hurting and confused, but you made too many interesting points to ignore.
Re read what you have posted, and I think its obvious that "man" has made his own problems 100% of the way..
EXACTLY!!!!!
#25
09-07-2005, 07:07 PM
Heart broken.
Hey Craig. Sorry to hear your bad news. Hang in there. You guys should both sit down and have a talk maybe out to dinner where the kids wont be around. I have been with my wife for almost 21 years. 13 of it married. We had a lot of problems about three years go and almost separated for good. We worked it out and now are still together and life is good. When ever I hear about someone divorcing I feel bad for the kids. I know what its like growing up with one parent. Either way things will end up one way or another. Best wishes to you and your family. I wish you the best.
One of your buds here on ATV connection. Derek
One of your buds here on ATV connection. Derek
#26
09-07-2005, 08:38 PM
Heart broken.
I feel like a baby right now. I am feeling you wingnut.
I want to say if you were getting along, it is worth fighting for. Either way, do what Dune me said and get an attorney. Don't have to let anyone know.
When a spouse announces they want a divorce, IT IS VITAL YOU AT LEAST SIT DOWN WITH AN ATTORNEY. Just so you have your ducks in a row in case a divorcewar starts. At that point it is ODP's 5 rules.
All the other stuff about women being a problem and men making things great is crap. Mankind f's everything up as it tries to make everything better. Men and women alike.
Life is a crazy ride. Hopefully your beliefs will help you be strong and make the right desicions. Hopefully the people who share your beiefs will support you as we do here.
Brian
I want to say if you were getting along, it is worth fighting for. Either way, do what Dune me said and get an attorney. Don't have to let anyone know.
When a spouse announces they want a divorce, IT IS VITAL YOU AT LEAST SIT DOWN WITH AN ATTORNEY. Just so you have your ducks in a row in case a divorcewar starts. At that point it is ODP's 5 rules.
All the other stuff about women being a problem and men making things great is crap. Mankind f's everything up as it tries to make everything better. Men and women alike.
Life is a crazy ride. Hopefully your beliefs will help you be strong and make the right desicions. Hopefully the people who share your beiefs will support you as we do here.
Brian
#27
09-07-2005, 08:39 PM
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 352
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Heart broken.
Guys, thank you for everything!!!!The support, the advice, the stories and all of the love. I also want to thank all of you for the pm's I got. There we're to many for me to respod individually, but you know who you are. I will take advantage of every offer you all made me. I think it will help me to talk to people that only I am friends with. Most of the friends we have are "our " friends, so I don't want to relay to much info to them.......see ya soon guys, thanks again, Craig
#28
09-07-2005, 09:24 PM
Heart broken.
Wingnut,
You're a good man. Take all this info and use whatever works best for your situation. Every single situation like this is different - EVERY ONE! Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. And whatever happens, know that you are among friends.
I'm glad you understand the trust issue. Very good. Surround yourself with only the most trustworthy friends that are 100% loyal to you - Make sure thier motives are absolutely good. You will find that 1 or 2 of them will dissappoint you, and violate that trust. After they do, trust them like you would your ex-wifes mother-in-law. Smile a lot, but dont give them anything they can use against you.
You're a good man. Take all this info and use whatever works best for your situation. Every single situation like this is different - EVERY ONE! Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. And whatever happens, know that you are among friends.
I'm glad you understand the trust issue. Very good. Surround yourself with only the most trustworthy friends that are 100% loyal to you - Make sure thier motives are absolutely good. You will find that 1 or 2 of them will dissappoint you, and violate that trust. After they do, trust them like you would your ex-wifes mother-in-law. Smile a lot, but dont give them anything they can use against you.
#29
09-07-2005, 09:26 PM
Military Rider
My hobbies are NASCAR, Rockin' in the Free World, and riding my Sand Pigs at every available opportunity.
My hobbies are NASCAR, Rockin' in the Free World, and riding my Sand Pigs at every available opportunity.
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 1,804
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Heart broken.
Damn ODP, those were some heavy bricks. Made a crusty old retired Marine get all misty eyed.
Sorry to hear your situation Craig and wish for you the best.
Haven't been through it myself but have been close several times as a Marine Corps career can wreak havoc on any relationship. My wife and I survived it, barely, because it took me so damn long to not be this big ol' macho Devil Dog and finally go to counselling and be made to listen and hear what she was saying and not what I wanted to hear her say, to open up and show my feelings. I'm not going to offer tons of advice because you've been given plenty and from those who have been through it so they speak from experience. I saw alot of it throughout my 20 years in and my two cents is to not pit the children against your wife or use them as pawns as seems to be the norm nowadays. They will Love you for it in the end.
Haven't met ya yet but I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
Hope to meet some of you Big Dogs and Heavy Hitters out at the ATV MXtravaganza next month. Told my wife about all of the post and camaradarie shared from DS Days and she asked why I didn't go? Go figure... Guess I'll keep my calander open for next year. I would like to get together with some of you guys at Dumont or Glamis and share info.
Hang in there Craig, you've got a growing list of friends here on the forum.
Vic
Sorry to hear your situation Craig and wish for you the best.
Haven't been through it myself but have been close several times as a Marine Corps career can wreak havoc on any relationship. My wife and I survived it, barely, because it took me so damn long to not be this big ol' macho Devil Dog and finally go to counselling and be made to listen and hear what she was saying and not what I wanted to hear her say, to open up and show my feelings. I'm not going to offer tons of advice because you've been given plenty and from those who have been through it so they speak from experience. I saw alot of it throughout my 20 years in and my two cents is to not pit the children against your wife or use them as pawns as seems to be the norm nowadays. They will Love you for it in the end.
Haven't met ya yet but I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
Hope to meet some of you Big Dogs and Heavy Hitters out at the ATV MXtravaganza next month. Told my wife about all of the post and camaradarie shared from DS Days and she asked why I didn't go? Go figure... Guess I'll keep my calander open for next year. I would like to get together with some of you guys at Dumont or Glamis and share info.
Hang in there Craig, you've got a growing list of friends here on the forum.
Vic
#30
09-07-2005, 10:23 PM
Heart broken.
As someone who has had many friends/acquaintances in the same situation as you, and who has a neighbor right now whose wife is about to leave him (although he doesnt know it), I know what you're going through. It is very tough but use the time for introspection. In hindsight, many of them could have seen it coming but didnt. All the houses and toys in the world dont matter in the end to women. What matters is the time you spemd with them and how you treat them. Most, including my neighbor have worked crazy hours and in their free time hang out with friends or do work related things. Their wives get lonely, bored, or feel neglected and in a matter of time end up leaving. I try to include my wife with my activities as if she were one of the guys and even if she doesn't like the activity, she likes the time together. Maybe you can reconcile your marriage, maybe not, but at least learn from it and try to find out what went wrong.