A ventriloquist cowboy walked into town and saw a rancher sitting on his porch with his dog:
Cowboy: "Hey, cool dog. Mind if I speak to him?"
Rancher: "This dog don't talk!"
Cowboy: "Hey dog, how's it going?"
Dog: "Doin alright"
Rancher: (Extreme look of shock)
Cowboy: "Is this your owner? (pointing at rancher)"
Dog: "Yep."
Cowboy: "How's he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good." He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Rancher: (Look of disbelief)
Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Rancher: "Horses don't talk!"
Cowboy: "Hey horse, how's it goin?"
Horse: "Cool."
Rancher: (an even wilder look of shock)
Cowboy: "Is this your owner?" (pointing at rancher)
Horse: "Yep."
Cowboy: "How's he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking." He rides me regularly, brushes me down often, and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Rancher: (total look of amazement)
Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your SHEEP?"
Rancher: (stuttering, and hardly able to talk)...... "Th-Th-Them sheep ain't nothin but liars!!!"

 

I know I don't[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif[/img] seeing you on your Raptor was enough for me to know, you didn't do to well[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif[/img]

 

LOL, So, Toyo, is that why you started riding a Raptor[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-confused.gif[/img]Because it doesn't talk[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif[/img]

 

you trying to say i didnt have fabulous form? [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif[/img] I thought i looked pretty good [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif[/img]

 

LOL, So, Toyo, is that why you started riding a Raptor[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-confused.gif[/img]Because it doesn't talk[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif[/img][/quote]

naa its why Hoss don't want us talkin to his womens [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif[/img] baaaah baaah baaaah

 

Tonights Dinner Story:

My 11-year old poses the question: "Dad, can you guess how much the fattest guy on the earth weighs?" We all threw out tonnage #'s......and he commences to tell us that he weighs approx. 1200 lbs. Well Kyler (6-years old) says, "I bet he has big *****." I thought wifey was going to spew soup out of her nose. [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-blush.gif[/img][img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif[/img][img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-shocked.gif[/img]

 

Now what are the odds that tomorrow Kyler's in the principal's office? LOL

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LOL[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif[/img] Gotta love a kid like that[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif[/img] Right Dad[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-cool.gif[/img]

 

LMFAO

[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif[/img][img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-cool.gif[/img][img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-tongue.gif[/img][img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif[/img]

 

Ohh man. If i had a son he would prolly talk like that [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif[/img] LMAO have you seen the big ***** video on Ebaums World?